Yesterday I received an email from an ex student. She was upset that I hadn't replied to her email a few weeks back. She expressed all the things that she had done for me in the past, and how upset she was that I had 'cast her aside'.The truth is I had been delighted to hear from her, and had joyfully emailed her back the same day.
Asumptions can be the death of relationships. We assume how someone else is feeling or thinking by a look, a gesture or a word, and the truth is we are often wrong. In the workplace this can create a high degree of conflict.
These days I try not to assume anything. It's tough because our brain thinks it knows better than we do, and it beavers away stacking up your thoughts and emotions like a squirrel storing winter nuts.
I have learned that it is better to clarify than assume. If someone says or does something that you don't like, ask them to expand. Doing this takes away the myriad of thoughts that you might mull over for the next few hours or days, wondering what the person REALLY meant, and how you could have dealt with it, and how you might deal with it in the future.
Cut to the chase, don't make assumptions and find out the facts {from the person involved - not third party or hearsay} before you start reacting emotionally.
What are your experiences on this? Be great to hear them.
Have a good day
Jan
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